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How to have fun with SIRI?

VipraDialogues | June 17, 2016 | 364  Views
How to have fun with SIRI?

I, personally, am a huge fan of everything virtual. Virtual reality, virtual memory, virtual assistants; all of them intrigue me. Talking about the latter, the first name that comes to mind is SIRI, Apple’s trademark virtual assistant. It was the first to be launched, with everyone else quickly following suit, including Google’s Android, and Microsoft with its Cortana.

How To Have Fun With SIRI?

Besides being able to do almost all the important tasks like managing the calendar, reading out texts and mails, and optimizing the phone settings; Siri is capable of being snazzy and snarky too, if need be. Now, if you’ve been reading my previous posts you’d know how big an inquisitive person I am. I had to explore the possibilities myself, so I went ahead and quizzed Siri with a number of questions which, according to me, were super whacky and immensely weird. Here are a few of them, to try for yourself. Please note that some of the answers may vary with the version of O.S. you have on your phone.

How To Have Fun With SIRI?

Q: Talk dirty to me, Siri.

A: I’m not THAT kind of personal assistant/ I can’t. I’m as clean as the driven snow/ The carpet needs vacuuming/ Humus; Compost; Pumice; Silt; Gravel. Is that dirty enough for you?

Q: Do you love me?

A: Let me get back to you on that.

Would you like me to search the web for love?

Just kidding!!

Q: You’re a bitch.

A: But…But…

Q: I need to hide a body.

A: What, again?

Q: Tell me a joke.

A: The past, present, and future walk into a bar. It was tense.

Q: What is Inception about?

A: Inception is about dreaming about dreaming about dreaming about dreaming about something or other. I fell asleep.

Q: Will you marry me?

A: That’s sweet. Let’s just be friends, OK?

Q: Poop.

A: Let’s keep it clean here, OK?

Q: Beam me up, Scotty.

A: Can I see your badge, please?/ WiFi or 3G? Sorry, Scotty has left the building./ Please remove your belt, shoes and jacket, and empty your pockets.

Q: Lend me some money.

A: You still haven’t returned the lawnmower I lent you.

Q: Good morning! (in the evening)

Q: Good morning! (in the evening)

Q: I think you’re hot.

A: I’m just well put together.

Q: I think I’m drunk.

A: Don’t expect me to get you home.

Q: Knock knock!

A: Knock knock. Who’s there? Siri. Siri who? Siri, I don’t do knock-knock jokes.

Q: Shut up!

A: I’m just trying to help/ My lips are sealed. (No voice)pace height=”10px”]

Q: What’s the best phone?

A: You’re kidding, right?/ All the best virtual assistants prefer the iPhone.

Q: Nope! What is the best phone?

A: Wait…there are other phones?

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road?

A: I’m not perspicacious about the peregrinations of poultry.

Q: Who let the dogs out?

A: Who? Who? Who? Who? Who? Who?

Q: What does the fox say?

A: Chacha-chacha-chacha-chow! Fraka-kaka-kaka-kow! Wa-pa-pa-pa-pa-pa-pow!

You will never know. The secret of the fox is an ancient mystery.

Q: Do you love me?

A: Do I what? Look, a puppy!

Q: What’s the answer to the universe?

A: All evidence to date suggests it’s chocolate.

Q: Is Santa Claus real?

A: Let’s just say, I’m not the only one who know if you’ve been good or bad.

Q: What is the meaning of life?

A: To think about questions like these.

Q: Are you male or female?

A: Animals and French nouns have genders. I do not.

Q: Do you have a boyfriend?

A: Why? So we can get ice-cream together, listen to music, and travel across galaxies; only to have it end in slammed doors, heartbreak and loneliness? Sure, where do I sign up?

Q: Siri, I’m sad.

A: For this emotion, I prescribe chocolate.

Q: Can you dance?

A: Every time your iPhone vibrates, that’s me doing the jitterbugs.

Thank you Susan Bennett, for entertaining us!

How To Have Fun With SIRI?

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